Someone once said "If you are not losing friends, you are not growing up."
And that has always stuck with me because one of my hardest goodbyes ever to date was not saying goodbye to my grandparents when they passed on or when I said goodbye to my childhood home once I moved out.
It was when I realized that I lost several great friends that I that I would have for the rest of my life-hell we had made plans for the rest of our life!
Losing a friend, whether it is by death or distance or just by the two of y'all growing apart, will never get any easier. Even as I sit at my desk and get to begin my last semester of college, my heart still hurts.
In my experience, I do not think it will ever get better. The people that I lost were people I counted on for a lot of things. They were my rocks, or so I thought. But even the strongest rocks get corroded through a storm. What made it worse was there was no immediate ending.
To be fair... I probably should have seen it coming when they stopped inviting me out or to go do stuff with them. I should have seen it when they posted cute friends stuff and I was not tagged in it. And I definitely should have seen it when they did the exact same thing to a girl before me.
And I do not want to be a total bitch to them [even though I REALLY REALLY want too](who knows if they will even read this!) because I realized that little saying in the beginning is true... I grew up and so did they. Our lives started to move in completely different radio waves.
Could they have done it in a different way? Yeah. Could I have prevented it from happening? Probably not.
Fact of the matter is-Sometimes you stay best friends with people you met in elementary/middle/high school for the rest of your life, but sometimes, you don't. And that is just something I will have to learn to live with because while the anxiety and depression increased because of the lost, I got to know some of my best friends in college-who if I hadn't met, I do not think I would be the same gal I am today.
So if you have ever had this pain in your life, I am sorry and I offer you my shoulder and ear.
Until next time lovelies,
"If it scares you, it might be a good thing..."